Here it is, kids. The much anticipated CD, "Please like us". Legend has it that it was first produced as an 8 track recording, but huge setbacks including a falling out with their management, members of their back up band "The lazy boys", and controversy over content prevented the actual release of their work, which was reputed to have cutting edge sounds and lyrical content that was just too...taboo for the time. After much litigation and some out of court settlements with undisclosed individuals for undisclosed sums, the material was transferred over to CD format (or "space age coasters" as Connie likes to call them). The result, a painfully obsolete looking cover that just screams 1964...and as for the content?
Well, let's just say 1964 wasn't ready for it...and timing is everything.
Connie and Reg are way hipper than they look, and older than you think!
Connie & Reg...always on the cutting edge!
"Now, who would ever have believed the day would come where you could just
dance the night away with music strapped on to your head for portability and
convenience?! So much easier than that nasty boom box we used to duct tape
to Reg's head... No doubt these babies were invented by someone who appreciated the "hands free" aspect...so, cheers to you my friend, whoever you are.
Now pass me another smoke..."
I guess we should have known better.
We showed this CD cover idea to Connie and Reg after they'd had lots of cocktails the night
Maybe it was too colorful, maybe it was the skewed stereo, or the swirly things all over the frame...
It was cool to see Reg's complexion match that green background before our very eyes.
Needless to say, it was rejected.
No. it's the size of your ass that makes you look fat.
Face it: it's called "middle age spread"...
No podcast can help with that.
So drink, smoke, and party your wrinkled little face off.
It won't make your ass smaller, but at least you'll be
drunk enough not to care.
Everybody knows, these days, you're not going to see a doctor smoking his face off for some kind of endorsement photo. But leave it to Connie and Reg! They found one. Yep, this guy's actually a doctor. Well, a doctor of geology...but throw a stethoscope and a lab coat on him, and voila! Who's gonna know the difference?
One smoking doctor endorsement! Brilliant.
That's right kids. Somewhere deep in suburbia,
Connie & Reg are setting up their very own pod cast so
you can listen in and try to figure out what they're all
about (and if you do, please let us know...cuz we're stumped).
You'll hear their tunes, their inappropriate banter, and - if you listen
close - the clinking of ice cubes swishing around in their cocktail glasses.
Mid Century Modern Design - there was an era! Unconventional, fluid lines, organic shapes, and going beyond the boundries of what was previously accepted as the norm...and then there's the furniture! Yep, Connie and Reg are definitely in that category. Hey, just check the date of birth on their driver's license if you need any more evidence...if you can get your hands on it!
Of course, Reg is too hepped up on meds and Connie's too drunk to actually put
a puzzle together...but if they did, here's what it would look like.
description of suspects:
1 male, white, middle aged, short dark hair & mustache, approximately 6'5" tall, 220lbs, last seen wearing bad mustard colored suit, patterned shirt and tie (all circa 1964). Wanted for fashion crimes, scotch breath, and disturbing the peace after 11 pm;
1 female, white, middle aged, short blonde hair, garish make-up, 5'8" in height, 120 lbs, last seen inappropriately wearing cocktail dress. Wanted for public smoking and misuse of blue box recycling program.
"Why look! It's Connie and Reg on the telly!"
Here's a picture perfect snapshot of a typical sophisticated couple in their suburban home enjoying a nice evening in with Connie and Reg. What fellow doesn't enjoy wearing a nice suit and crisply starched shirt to relax after a hard day at the office? And, of course, who couldn't notice how neat and trim his lovely wife looks in her afternoon dress after a hard day of scrubbing that linoleum floor in the living room to its fabulous dull finish! Why these people need the entertainment and Connie and Reg deliver. Just look at the sheer joy and delight on those little faces! Too bad this baby doesn't come with a remote...but who cares? It's not like you'd ever want to change the channel! As for the guy in the picture with his thumb poised? Yeah, well that's just how forward thinking these swingers are...always ahead of the trend. As for the remote...it's coming...it's coming....
So much for gender sensitivity...
In case you hadn't noticed, Connie and Reg are kind of stuck in that mid 60s "happy hour" vibe...clearly visible in their fashion sense, drinking, smoking, and overall lack of dietary concerns. (When asked, Reg thought "cholesterol" was some kind of automotive fluid, and Connie argued it was either some new fangled cleaning product or one of the other types of alcohol that'll kill you if you drink it).
All that aside, they're both equally confused when it comes to good taste in advertising. Connie still thinks that most women wear heels, a party frock and pearls when vaccuuming around the house. She's soooo sophisticated.